Saturday, July 18, 2009

Astaghfirallāh- there is something makes me want to vomit

sorry for the disgusting heading but it is quite true.... here is what happened:

I discovered the answer to my own question from my last post:

The question: Why women do not go the the Masjid in Pakistan and other parts of the world?

The Answer: Why worship Allah in the Masjid, when you can Worship your husband at home? ASTAGHFIRALLAH!
*Sorry to who this may offend, this is a gross overgeneralization* here is how I reached this conclusion:

husband and mother in law were lounging on the bed talking ( once again reminded of a book review I need to write) I decided to join them, wish i did not do that.
mother in law started taking about her sons and their wives... she has four sons including the one i made the odd choice to marry.

"Tawhida, you know my daughter in law Iman loves her husband so much that she does not sleep at night, NOT AT ALL. she stay s up all night rubbing his legs and feet. She can not sleep if he is not comfortable" well pardon me but I happen to know Iman's husband beats her, will not let her learn to drive, and so on. " And my other daughter in law loves her husband so much that as soon as she wakes up she makes sure his cloths are ironed and ready" well I happen to know her husband beats her and cheat on her habitually.

I wanted to say to her "you know I must love your son a whole bunch because I did not divorce him when I should have... I really should have, any normal woman would have.. and he is still on probation and probably will be for the rest of his life. And any way!! since when does suffering show I love somebody. I guess she thinks I hate her son because I don't kiss he feet every morning... PLEASE!!!

What do you all think... am I just being a grouch?

PS: there are toenail clippings on my coffee table... YAY!


Stephanie said...

Um yeah, I'm sure I would have vomited on the spot. Makes me angry just reading the post. Culture is so screwed up. Always comes first before Islam it seems. I don't believe my husband would ever treat me this way, but if he ever did, thank God I am educated, have a job, and access to a divorce!

struggling said...

These women are so stupid for staying with these men, I don't care what culture you were brought up in, I mean you;d think somewhere comon sense and knowledge of the teachings of the Quran would have to prevail....I guess not always though. I really hope these people don't have children, what a thing to teach them, women worship your husbands more than Allah and men treat your wife like a machine, all the while go against the Quran with abuse and fornication....yea great lesson to teach your kids. I can tell your mother in law thinks this is all normal, no wonder her sons are like this

Thirst For Knowledge said...

ugh, i find it sickning how mothers can be so blind to their sons negative behaviors! foreign moms are the worse, they worship their sons and treat them like gods! they do their laundry, cook for them, act as their servant; and these are grown men! most mother in laws have a complew with their daughter in laws and feel jealousy toward her. i think its because they lack a relationship with their own husband so turn to their son as a scapegoat. as a wife who has endured emotional and physical abuse i know how difficult it is to stay with someone who continusouly mistreats you and whose parents think their son is amazing!

i think if the moms stop treating their sons like babnies and condoning their behavior than inshaallah these men would grow up and stop being so cultural and learn to respect their wives and treat them kindly!!!!!

jana z. said...

niceeee!! apparently her blindness and apparent adoration of her sons is what led them to be the way they are!!!! she probably never chastised them either while they were growing up..puhleeezze dont get me really started!!

go ahead and vomit a nurse, ill hold the bucket!!

Lazeena Umm Yusuf said...

okay those qualities sound more of what a slave would do than a wife. what the heck??

Sunni Hijabi said...

Subhanallah. Do all of her sons have problems?

cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

Grrrr it really makes me angry to hear stories like these! Seriously, it's these women's fault too for not leaving men who treat them so bad. Why do they stay?

Ms. Mango said...

Salaam ladies

Thank you all so much for your comments it helps to know that I am not the one with the problem as my husband and his family would have me believe. It is sad the way my mother in law is treated after 35 years of slaving away her husband will not even sleep in the same bed as her or share the same cup! It is alot to do with culture and the fadct that the women seem to be in a race to see who can suffer the most. It makes me sick! so what to do when you hate your husbands culture and pray that he does not start to treat me like I am one of those mindless spineless women?

AlabasterMuslim said...

Wow! It says a lot when the sons are all messed up...shows how the parents have raised them! its apparent by how they still praise their son's wives because of the abuse they are going through. But thank god some children have the sence to grow up with a mind and attitude of their own.

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