I made it!

Well everyone I made it through my in laws visit, They are now far far away and I have my home back!! It was not easy





in the 15 days that felt like a year I...

1. ran away from home twice in 2 weeks.


2. shopped impulsively to annoy my in laws.


3. ran away from my father in law( he was trying to convince me to come back home)


4. told my mother in law what I really thought of her son (but she does not really understand English so...)


5. cried a lot.


6. played a total of 6 hours of solitaire on my cell phone while everyone chatted in Urdu totally oblivious to the English speaking chick.


7. ran the dishwasher 3 times a day.


8. now have hours of cleaning to do thanks to her daily bread making.


9. spent as much time out of the house as I could working and spending time with my grandmother


10. decided that if I ever get married again my husband must be an orphan.

Astaghfirallāh- there is something makes me want to vomit

sorry for the disgusting heading but it is quite true.... here is what happened:

I discovered the answer to my own question from my last post:

The question: Why women do not go the the Masjid in Pakistan and other parts of the world?

The Answer: Why worship Allah in the Masjid, when you can Worship your husband at home? ASTAGHFIRALLAH!
*Sorry to who this may offend, this is a gross overgeneralization* here is how I reached this conclusion:

husband and mother in law were lounging on the bed talking ( once again reminded of a book review I need to write) I decided to join them, wish i did not do that.
mother in law started taking about her sons and their wives... she has four sons including the one i made the odd choice to marry.

"Tawhida, you know my daughter in law Iman loves her husband so much that she does not sleep at night, NOT AT ALL. she stay s up all night rubbing his legs and feet. She can not sleep if he is not comfortable" well pardon me but I happen to know Iman's husband beats her, will not let her learn to drive, and so on. " And my other daughter in law loves her husband so much that as soon as she wakes up she makes sure his cloths are ironed and ready" well I happen to know her husband beats her and cheat on her habitually.

I wanted to say to her "you know I must love your son a whole bunch because I did not divorce him when I should have... I really should have, any normal woman would have.. and he is still on probation and probably will be for the rest of his life. And any way!! since when does suffering show I love somebody. I guess she thinks I hate her son because I don't kiss he feet every morning... PLEASE!!!







What do you all think... am I just being a grouch?

PS: there are toenail clippings on my coffee table... YAY!

Really?

Today was family day at the Masjid. There was food, games, gossip, hijabs for sale (I had to buy one!) birth announcements, the whole bit. I decided this would be a great opportunity for my in laws to see the diversity of the American Muslims. It was fun, I enjoyed my self and being among my peeps, after we prayed and were about to leave my mother in law Amee said something that was actually a little shocking to me. First the backstory:

Amee has lived all her life in Pakistan, this is her forst time outside of the country, she is educated, a teacher like myself. Amee's father was a wealthy landlord who was quite religiously conservative. Amee does not hijab like most Pakistani women but it still quite modest. Amee is from an area of Pakistan that borders Afghanistan. Knowing all this I was still stunned when my 58 year old mother in law said "this is my first time at a Masjid"

Pakistan is a Muslim country (in theory) there is a Masjid on every corner.... so WHY? The misjid is the house of Allah... Why had she never went? she told me that she was happy to have been at the Masjid and had me take her picture so that she could show her friends when she went back home.

Really? I don't understand why women would not be welcomed or at least have their own Masjids... I still don't get it.

what is your opinion?

The in-laws are coming!

That's right...on their way as I type. hubby just spent a week with them in Chicago where his brother got married... I did not go because I had to help organize my mothers family Reunion (Hey.. it was planned before the wedding!) besides I think many Pakistani weddings are sort of um...over the top... I mean it is just my opinion but renting a large hall to display your wealth, dancing and painting your self for days, introducing yourself by first stating your occupation "salaam, meet my sister the Doctor, Fatima. Fatima, meet kindergarten teacher Tawhida... she is married to Khan, a student"
(everyone is a doctor or an engineer ya know so.... I we seem more like the hired help) It just has nothing to do with the purpose of marriage. My parents were married in a Masjid and the family cooked an awesome meal, my dad baked their cake!! Why the spectacle folks? It all makes my head hurt. anyway, watch the vid... get my point?


now back to the point... MY IN LAWS ARE COMING!!!!
I think they will be here for two weeks, I am just hoping that in these two weeks our cultures don't clash to much or that I don't get totally ignored since I don't speak their language. I just have the feeling some dark truths will come to light, because everything looks so nice when you are on the other side of the globe....
Make a Du'ah... that I make it out of this one with all my marbles